“How come you don’t have a job?” – Satan
When someone says that they know of a position you can apply for.
Wait, so you're saying there's actually an opening I haven't heard of? That's pretty much impossible.
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When you can sense someone’s about to ask you if you found a job.
Please don't ask me that. I'm trying, OK? Let me live.
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And when you decide to lie because that animal shelter you volunteered at one time back in high school kinda counts as a job.
I mean, I haven't showed up there in, like, five years, but I think they still know my name so it's not really a lie.
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When someone in college says they’ll find a job right after they graduate.
Good luck with that.