17 Food Poisoning Horror Stories That’ll Make You Cringe, Then Laugh

“Nothing says ‘love’ like seeing your husband poop in the bathtub while you’re puking your brains out in the toilet.”

My college roommates and I tried a new Mexican place for dinner. The food poisoning hit me first a few hours later. It felt like a thousand angry little demons were stabbing my insides with white-hot daggers. I ran to the bathroom and the gates of hell blasted open. I was sweating, crying, and shitting more than I ever thought possible. Then, I heard a bang as my roommate tore open the door and proceeded to vomit partially-digested tacos all over my half-naked body, which was expelling the contents of satan's soul into the toilet.

caitlina4c0

The night before I was due to start my new job as an English teacher, I went out for a celebratory meal with my boyfriend and our friends. I had oysters. Everything was fine until I arrived at school the next morning, when I started to feel queasy, but I chocked it up to nerves. I welcomed my new class into the classroom and taught for about 20 minutes, but then I couldn't open my mouth for fear of vomiting. The kids started talking and laughing, until I projectile-vomited across the room, spraying quite a few of my new students in the front row. It's fair to say I was never their favorite teacher.

rubyr4b7f

Universal


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